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Posts Tagged ‘pregnancy’
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They kept an eye on the monitor for the baby and me so she didn’t get too stressed but holy hell it hurt like the dickens. I guess it would have worked if I had more amniotic fluid but for all the water I was drinking it was pretty tight in there. Obby held my hand and I yelled about the kind of pancakes I was going to have as a treat once we were done. Obby had looked up the procedure before we went so he knew what I was in for. I’m thankful he didn’t tell me or I would have stressed about it.
Ideally you want the baby to turn into the labor position, head down, on their own. Mine wasn’t even rolling over. She was butt down, head under my ribs, feet jumping on the bed on my right side the whole time. I tried everything just so I could go into the c-section knowing that all options had been exhausted. I bounced on an exercise ball. I knelt on the bed and did handstands on the floor every morning and evening. I got these charcoal things that you’re supposed to burn near your toes where the acupuncture point that induces a baby rotation is. Hell no, I didn’t think that insense next to my toes was going to do diddly squat, but I wanted to check it all off of the list so I wouldn’t feel like ‘if only I did that one thing, everything would be different’. I held ice packs and frozen pees at her head and warm packs and music at my diddly bits. That kid never budged an inch. I went into that surgery with a conscience clear as fucking crystal.
Everything’s fine. Everything turned out fine.
THIS is why I waited to post about the pregnancy. In the past when I did comics about laughing at/with pregnant friends I always waited until the baby was born and home safe before I posted the comics. I did not want to jinx it. In Real Life I have a two year old daughter. Delaying the comics about said daughter allows for us to deal with any bumps in life before we start telling jokes about it to the world. I am not going to taunt fate in real time. Also she will eventually have an opinion about what I make fun of her about in the comic. Hopefully she will be more willing to laugh at her past self than her present self. Only time will tell.
